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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24819874">never meant to last</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/idkalysia/pseuds/idkalysia'>idkalysia</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>ash finished a work! what! [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Anne with an E (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Break Up, F/M, Heartbreak, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Not Beta Read, Pining, Toronto, anne is a teacher, are they all ooc?, but also probably ooc, gilbert is a medical resident, gilbert is such an idiot, probably sorry, written at 3 am</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 03:07:05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,835</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24819874</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/idkalysia/pseuds/idkalysia</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“Our competition is what I always loved about us, Gilbert. We pushed each other to be better.”</p><p>Gilbert looked as though he went through a multitude of emotions before whispering, scared, “And we don’t now?”</p><p>in which loving Gilbert Blythe isn't enough</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Gilbert Blythe/Anne Shirley, Implied Gilbert Blythe/Winifred Rose</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>ash finished a work! what! [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2076594</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>45</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. one; in which anne shirley cuthbert says goodbye</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>this was a quickwrite i wrote while i was thinking about these two and itching to write angst, im so so sorry shirbert shippers, they were just the latest ship to feel my murderous wrath!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Anne knew what it was like to be in love. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>You could say Anne was in love with everything and everyone she had ever come in contact with. She swooned over appreciation and support people showed her, made friends with the trees, and felt the wind support her as she walked through her life. It wasn’t the same type of infatuation Ruby tended to show, weeping as her favorite TV show character got hurt or smiling as she talked to those she loved as if they were her world (they were). It was much more primal, as though the connections that Anne made kept her going (they did). </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>(It was the reason why everyone thought Gilbert fell in love with her.)</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Anne never saw it coming, the supernova that was Gilbert’s love for her. He became a constant in her life, a driving force for her, one that supported her through her ups and downs, a fact that 14 year old Anne Shirley-Cuthbert would frown upon, but a fact nonetheless. It was just high school. To most. But to her, it was a place where she had finally begun to feel accepted. (Although, it was still hard. Easier, with Gilbert by her side, but hard.)</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Their relationship was magical, and they were a force to be reckoned with. It had been months, and she still felt electrified by his touch, and drowned in his eyes when he looked at her with such adoration that she felt as though she was melting, her eyes shining as she looked away shyly. Everything about her and Gilbert Blythe was that of dreams, and at times she couldn’t fathom why she had hated him so much. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She knew that Gilbert had had relationships before her. She wasn’t stupid, and he was older and handsome and had a charm to him, as though he were a 1950s gentlemen. She understood that girls likely fell at his feet and were lined up to date him, and that’s why she was so surprised when he had chosen </span>
  <em>
    <span>her</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Yeah, she knew she was a catch and all, but to Gilbert, she was more and that was all she could ever ask for. Those girls would have to wait their turn because she was not going to let him go that easily. </span>
</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was so </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucking</span>
  </em>
  <span> stupid to be fighting about what they were. Frankly, it wasn’t either of their faults, but they fought all the same. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Anne, are you kidding me? You didn’t tell me the tickets were sold out, you just expected me to find out at the venue?” The girl could see the disappointment pooling in her boyfriend’s eyes as he threw his jacket over to the side of the room. Matthew and Marilla weren’t bound to be home for hours as they were visiting the Lyndes’, who’d moved to the next city over after Thomas Lynde had had a heart attack. The larger city had a better hospital, better equipped for his condition and easiest for the Lyndes’ to access. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You mean to tell me, it was my job? </span>
  <em>
    <span>My</span>
  </em>
  <span> job to make sure for Mr. Gilbert Blythe that </span>
  <em>
    <span>his</span>
  </em>
  <span> concert tickets were still available? What did you expect? That is not my job, Gilbert! If we had just bought the tickets beforehand like I said-”</span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>“Oh, so this means </span>
  <em>
    <span>I’m</span>
  </em>
  <span> always the bad guy, doesn’t it? Is it so bad I just wanted a weekend to myself with my girlfriend, Anne?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Don’t turn this around now, Blythe!”</span>
  <span><br/>
<br/>
</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Am I, now?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The frustration grew in both of them as they hurriedly put their things down on the table in front of them and continued. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes, you are! We didn’t even have to go to that stupid concert, we could’ve done </span>
  <em>
    <span>anything</span>
  </em>
  <span> else!” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Why is it that we had to change our plans, Anne?” Gilbert’s expression hardened and his fists closed as he looked at the wall behind her, then settled on staring her down. “Why could’ve you have just checked.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s not my fault, and you know it!” Anne waved her arms frantically as she stared her boyfriend down. She knew he knew this wasn’t her fault. She didn’t understand why she was the one who had had to check if tickets were still available. He looked at her the same, as if challenging her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>His expression softened and his voice lowered. “We’re always in competition, aren’t we? Why is that, Anne? Why does there always have to be a problem, why can’t we just agree, ever?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“This is not about the tickets.” She stiffened as she remembered the reason she’d even agreed to go in the first place. She felt the tears rising at the corners of her eyes but pushed them away as she replied: “Our competition is what I always loved about us, Gilbert. We pushed each other to be better.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gilbert looked as though he went through a multitude of emotions before whispering, scared, “And we don’t now?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t say that-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You didn’t have to.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Anne fell onto the couch behind her and buried her face into her hands. She finally let the tears flow, and it was like a dam behind her eyes broke. Everything she had known about the boy in front of her was running through her mind, and the more she thought, the less she knew him. She was letting him go, that easily, because it was too much, too much at that point. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>In the smallest voice Gilbert had ever heard from her, she said: “Then go.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Anne, I-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Please, go.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The regret was plastered on Gilbert’s face as he looked at the girl in front of him. She looked small and broken, nothing like the Anne Shirley-Cuthbert he had known and loved.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I cheated on you. With Winnie. Anne I'm so sorry” He admitted, putting all his cards on the table. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The silence in the room was heartbreaking as she looked up and him and sobbed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know. Go, now, Gilbert Blythe, or I will call the police. Get the hell out of my house.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You </span>
  <em>
    <span>know</span>
  </em>
  <span>?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I do. And I should’ve broken up with you the second I found out because you didn’t deserve a second chance. I never should’ve given it to you. Get the </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span> out.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>So he did. He complied. He turned around and shut the door behind him. And he knew he shouldn't have been angry because it began from nothing and it turned into everything and he knew that he had lost. Even if he had won the argument that evening, he had lost. As he walked towards his car, he pretended he couldn’t hear the sobs he left behind him.</span>
</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>Their breakup was so </span>
  <em>
    <span>high school</span>
  </em>
  <span>. It was like she had him one day, and lost him the next. No more navigator, no more support system. It wasn’t that the people around her didn’t notice, it was more that, they didn’t care. They’d just move on to the next pretty couple to swoon over and she’d be left with her heart broken. Yeah, whatever. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She’d known he had cheated on her for 2 days, 7 hours, 38 minutes and (roughly) 20 seconds.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. two; in which gilbert blythe mourns.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>gilbert knew he fucked up. he didn't deserve forgiveness.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>hey! so i never was going to write a second part to this story, but i really wanted to do gilbert's point of view, so, here you go. it's mostly after he got kicked out of anne's house.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Gilbert John Blythe, was such a fucking idiot.</span>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <span>He had had everything he'd ever wanted.</span>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <span>And he'd fucked it up in one, stupid, drunk night.</span>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Honestly, he knew he deserved what he'd gotten. But he had never expect Anne to </span>
  <em>
    <span>know</span>
  </em>
  <span> before he had gotten to tell her himself. He shook his head angrily at himself. He knew he had never expected to tell her anyway.</span>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Winnie Rose was an old friend. They'd grown up together, long before he'd known Anne. Winnie had moved away years before the Cuthberts adopted Anne, and Gilbert hadn't thought about her since. Seeing her at that party was like a breath of fresh air, a reminder of his childhood. His residency had him working at all hours of the day, he was surprised he'd even found time for Moody's going-away party at all. Winnie was beautiful, Gilbert had always thought so. But no one was as beautiful as his Anne. </span>
  <span>Not Yours,</span>
  <span> his body shook as he sat on the side of the road.</span>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Anne not being there was a last-minute thing. Being a teacher, Anne wasn't nearly as busy as Gilbert was. He was surprised they had made it work, but Anne always found time for him. That night, she had decided to start preparing a Halloween theme for her classroom. Halloween was about 2 weeks away, but Anne had said, "I'll be so busy grading papers, Gil! I've got to get it done early, you go to that party and say goodbye to Moody and Ruby for me. I'll be seeing Ruby tomorrow anyway, Diana and I are saying goodbye on our own." </span>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <span>The tears streaming down his face did nothing in quelling his fury at himself. </span>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Gilbert didn't know how to live without Anne. He'd been one-half of Gilbert-and-Anne for so long, that being just Gilbert wasn't even a reality anymore. He felt like someone had cut him in half, and the horrible thing was, that he was the one who'd done the cutting. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He shouldn’t have gone. Gilbert wasn’t a drinker, he knew he never had been. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Waking up in Winnie’s bed was petrifying.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>On top of that, he couldn’t even remember it. He knew it had been done just as he knew that Anne would never forgive him. But he couldn’t remember doing it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He knew he didn’t deserve forgiveness, he didn’t expect it, nor did he want it. Anne was the best person Gilbert had ever met. He didn’t deserve her, not after this. He knew that.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But god, did it hurt to know. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He’d finish his residency and move to Toronto, just like he was going to do after high school. Anne would never have to see him again. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gilbert Blythe knew he’d have to start over. An orphan, who’d lived in a small town his entire life, in a big city with no one. But he would do it, for Anne, because she deserved better, and without him around, she’d find that. Just like he’d always wanted.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He reached into his trouser pants, and pulled out the ring he’d bought a month ago. It seemed shinier now, taunting him with what could’ve been. If this was a movie, Gilbert would’ve thrown the ring into the river in front of him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>It had cost him nearly C$2000, so he decided against it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gilbert walked for a while. Every 2 miles or so, he’d break down, and sob. It was a comfortable pattern, if he did say so himself. Once he reached his apartment, he took no time and began to pack. None of his friends would want to see him anyway, so he’d go.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was better for everyone if Gilbert John Blythe became a memory of Avonlea.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>2 days, 10 hours, and 15 minutes ago, he had ruined his own life.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He deserved it.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>so, how's this? it hurt me to write, i hate reading angst, but looove writing it haha.</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>comment, give kudos, and follow for more!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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